Patriarchy weighs heavily on women with disabilities

By Lorraine Metha

Grace Ngwenya (37) who lives in Gweru says women with disabilities face numerous challenges, especially in Zimbabwe’s patriarchal societies. Grace says women are still valued according to the amount of domestic duties that they do in their families.

“I have a disability and there are so many challenges that I experience on a daily basis. I am not able to do some household chores that other able bodied women can do. The whole system of womanhood in Zimbabwe is centred on what a woman can do at household level. This puts too much pressure on me and I always feel inadequate,” says Grace.

Grace says she was born in a family of four and that there are no other family members who have a disability. Her family provides her with emotional and financial support whenever she is struggling but they do not baby sit her or treat her as if she is different.

Grace says the greatest test for women with disability is when they start dating or are getting into marriage.

“Marriage is a big headache for women with disabilities because in-laws and other members of the extended family have expectations of the duties that they expect the new daughter-in-law to perform. Failure to perform such duties results in frosty relationships,” says Grace.

Grace says she was once involved in a serious relationship but could not continue after noticing signs that her relationship was heading towards a heart-break because of pressure for close family members. She says she is now devoted to trying to better herself as an individual and does not see herself getting into another relationship soon.

Grace says besides the duties that women are expected to perform, some women with disabilities face daily humiliation of having to depend on others, especially on private issues such as menstrual health management.

“Personally my worst nightmare is going for my period. I have an assistant who helps me but it is very tough with each change of sanitary wear I feel my sense of self pride lowering. This kind of makes me lose confidence and lowers my self-esteem,” says Grace.

Grace says she has benefited from the skills availed to her at King George VI Rehabilitation Centre in Bulawayo. Grace says she has been at King George for rehabilitation and during her time she learned various life skills such as cleaning and making jewellery

Grace says Kings George VI also has an occupational therapy department where the girls are taught how to clean their environment regardless their physical disabilities.

“ I am fortunate that I am amongst a few women who can afford an aide, the majority of persons with disability come from low income households therefore they do not have the assistance to do day to day chores,” says Grace.